How to Behave Online While in a Relationship

These days, everyone and their momma is online (and grandma and great grandma, etc.). It’s gotten to the point where nearly everything we do ends up on some social media site one way or another. Our entire life is now housed in two forums: reality and cyber-reality. It’s a strange, strange world we live in, people (and yes, I get the irony of my posting and promoting this very article across multiple online platforms blah blah blah…).

This is never more true than when we’re romantically involved with another person. Not only are we expected to put forth a supreme effort in reality, but even more so in the online community as well. But how do we toe the line without overdoing it in the sharing of our love (or “like”) while online? I’m glad you asked!

I’ve come up with five quick tips that will help you in the online arena of your romantic relationship, as well as keep you from making everyone else want to throw up and/or gouge their own eyes out.
WARNING: More than likely, I’m about to hurt one or two feelings. Just remember that I’m trying to help and that this is all in good fun.

As Peter Pan once said, “Here we gooooooo!”:

Do…Own Up to Your Relationship Status
This one is easy and breezy. If you’re in a relationship, own up to it.
No, you don’t have to share every morsel of information with your online following, but if you’re committed to another person, don’t hide that fact.
People who claim to be single (or let others assume that they are) when they’re not aren’t to be trusted in my book.
So if you have a significant other, don’t hide them!

Don’t…Put All of Your Relationship Drama Out There for the World to See
Relationships aren’t always sunshine and lollipops; you’re going to struggle sometime. And when you do, it’s important to remember that your relationship is between you and your partner, not you, your partner, and everyone else with an internet connection.
So as tempting as it is to post those vague Taylor Swift lyrics in an attempt to let your beau know something is amiss or post your grievances on their wall so they’re absolutely sure to get the message, don’t.
If you have something to say, say it directly to the person who needs to hear it in a private forum (that’s why God created text messaging). There’s no reason everyone should have the 411 on what’s going on between you two (even though we’re all nosy and want so badly to see the drama unfold before our desperate little eyes…).

Do…Have an Identity Outside of Your Relationship
This is true in reality as well as online. It’s extremely important to have your own identity outside the workings of our coupling. So while it’s great to acknowledge you’re in a relationship and all that, it’s not imperative that every status update, tweet, and photo be about your super duper awesome girlfriend/boyfriend. Not only is this slightly obsessive, but it tends to get on people’s nerves as well, and that’s how you get blocked and/or unfollowed.
Note: if you’re dating someone who requires everything you post to be about them, take a long hard look at the relationship to make sure it’s the right fit; no one should be that controlling.

Don’t…Post a Picture(s) of You Two Kissing
I just stepped on some toes, didn’t I? Yeeeaaaahhh…
Look, it’s fine that you two like to kiss. Kissing is awesome. But why does the world need to see it? We know you’re a couple! We assume you kiss! That and unless you’re attractive on Uncle Jessie and Aunt Rebecca’s level, we don’t want to see you kissing anyway!
I get it if it’s engagement and/or wedding pictures; that’s different, but you and your boyfriend/girlfriend standing in the bathroom mirror, kissing and taking pictures? No, no, no, NOOOOOO. Just stop it for everyone’s sake—including your own.

Do…Take it Easy on the Constant Displays of Affection
I stepped on the other toes that time, huh? I’m only trying to help here!
I get that you’re crazy about this person you’re committed to and that makes you want to shout it to the mountaintops. I’ve been there.
But there’s no reason to over do it by posting on their wall every day about how much you love and miss them. Again, that’s why God invented texting and phone calls, so keep it private.
Want to post something to them once a week or so? Perfect! Not only will you be seen as a sane person who cares for their partner, but you also won’t make other people despise your happiness. And that’s a good thing.

Well there you go. Take these five steps and apply them to your relationship in cyberspace. Doing so will keep you from being “THAT” person. If not, that’s what you get for listening to the guy who has set more than one building on fire (MY BROTHERS’ FAULT EVERY SINGLE TIME!).

You can follow me on Twitter here. Thank you for reading.
You can buy my debut novel, “
These Were the Nightshere

  1. I think I just “amened” every point! Especially the kissing pics when they’re just bf/gf… I always wondered why people constantly did that.

  2. MarieLa said:

    YES YES YES!!! This is precisely why I block a lot of ppl on my social media! Aside from the fact that I am ZERO romantic, I can’t stand people showing their love so out in the open and get all kissy lovey dovey ON MY WALL. I just don’t wanna know! Prude anybody? Youbetcha!

  3. Cassi Clerget said:

    Mostly I’m impressed by all the pop culture references, but you make some great points. We are so used to putting everything about ourselves online, we forget that not everyone wants to see it. Besides, I think private displays of affection are more special than a wall post for the whole universe to see. We should be secure in our relationships and not need our significant other to be constantly telling us how they feel online. Anyways, well said!

  4. Sal said:

    I have a friend who got engaged a few years ago (he’s married since) but SEVERAL months before his wedding, his fiancée decided it would be nice to give him frequent countdown reminders until the wedding. Yes, every few weeks a couple months before the wedding is alright, but “288 days, baby!” is kinda irritating.
    You should also check out the site STFU Marrieds- not necessarily married people, but just people who post far too much about their relationship.

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